Thursday, June 2, 2011

An Eventful Morning

It was a diner, and I arrived as soon as I was able. It was fairly early, and I walked in with Glorius and Acedia right behind me, scanned the area, and immediately recognized three figures. Well, OK, one figure, but it was easy to deduce the identities of her two companions because I actually read information that's made public to me (seriously, Peter, aren't you some sort of secret agent or whatever? How did you NOT figure out who she is?).

Anyway, I walked over to Charlotte, Hunter, and Peter, and promptly introduced myself. I don't think it was a rude introduction, I just said "Hello, my name is Steward. I don't believe we've met." That's not rude or offensive is it? You'd think it was from the way they reacted. Really, they all went stiff (except for Charlotte, obviously, remember her? The Wooden Girl's little puppet with a smile that is WAY too old for her?)

Then Peter and Hunter pulled guns on me.

Admittedly, there weren't many people in the diner, but the few who were there got real quiet. I gestured to those people. "Really?" I asked. "That's how you say 'hello'? You shoot me? In front of all these people? I think that kid over is like five. You'll scar him for life. Do you really want that your shoulders."

"Get out," Peter told me. "Now. Take your little freaks and leave."

I turned to Glorius and Acedia. "Did you hear that?" I asked. "He called you circusfolk."

That's when Charlotte lunged.

She had a knife in her hand, and went straight for Peter's throat with it. Unfortunately, the bastard was fast (almost disturbingly so) and managed to not only dodge her but also grab her and push her away. And it looked like the end had come for dear Charlotte, when Hunter, bless his little confused brain, tried to protect her from his ally. His only ally.

You see? This is what happens when you don't communicate.

Charlotte slipped away and gave me that too old smile. "Hi, Stewie," she said. "Remember me?"

"Of course," I told her. "How could I forget? You're creepy as fuck."

She giggled. "There's a lot we need to discuss. Shall we?"

I nodded, and opened up a gate to the Path of Black Leaves. "Take care of the two morons," I told my two associates, and stepped onto the Path, Charlotte behind me.

She told me a lot of strange things. Peter, did you know that your pocketwatch is, in fact, the larval form of a god? Funny how that works isn't it? Shame you lost it to this Hunter guy. And Hunter, shame you lost it to this Maxwell character.

My readers may be wondering why I'm addressing dead people, so I might as well tell you: Glorius came back with a hole in his shoulder and promptly collapsed. Acedia was shot in her thigh and is too hysterical to tell us whatever the hell happened. Guess I'll have to wait for one of the morons to blog about it.

Anyway, tonight we're heading to some graveyard. Apparently some cultists meet there or something.

Cultists. Graveyard. Dead....

Fuck.

-STEWARD

12 comments:

  1. Fuck. You. Asshole.

    And what's with you changing what I really said...?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Oh gee. Two people hear different things. I WONDER HOW THAT HAPPENED? I thought you were supposed to be informed about these things, genius? Are you really incapable of making simple deductions?

    It was the fucking Choir, Einstein.

    -STEWARD

    ReplyDelete
  3. I know that, I just like to mess with you, Slave.

    Really though, why are they here, slendy freak?

    Don't you people keep tabs on each other?

    ReplyDelete
  4. I assume they're here to attend the birth of a new god... Oh, but spoilers.

    -STEWARD

    ReplyDelete
  5. No, me and my friend are going to stop that.

    Ta-ta for now, time to get some rest.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Ah, the Jester has invited you to an audience with the Queen of Threads. Be careful - you don't want you to get your strings around you.

    ReplyDelete
  7. The Highmind Awaits

    ReplyDelete
  8. Mr. Highmind,
    I regret to inform you that your comments have grown annoying. Go to hell.

    -RS

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous, I regret to inform you that your comments have grown annoying. Go to hell.

      Delete
  9. Petey, shut up, you are pretentious as Hell. HOW WILL YOU STOP A GOD?

    ReplyDelete