Friday, August 5, 2011

Life Goes On

I, um, I have a confession to make.

I've never been in a relationship (at least not that I can remember, though I doubt I ever had some kind of hildhood romance, so...). Not really. I mean, there were girls that I liked but I was too shy, too scared to really talk to them...

Yeah. I know. The big bad "proxy" (God, I hate that word) is a little loser underneath his tough-guy exterior. Shut up.

Glorius and Acedia-- Gerald and Dana-- they had each other. When life was too much for either one to bear, they looked to one another for support. I never had something like that. Even with my friends, I was always distant. I have trouble really relating to other people. Well, no that's not the word I'm looking for. I have trouble connecting to other people.

So yeah. That's me. Never had a girlfriend. Never been kissed.

Until the other day.

It's just... it's been so hard. Losing those two. And me and Lexi, we're together constantly....

I mean, there was attraction since day one, but... Maybe we're just clinging to each other because we're both hurt. Is that healthy?

Heh. Look at me, concerned for my mental health when I work for an incomprehensible monstrosity.

I'm just afraid. Afraid that I'll lose her. Afraid that I'll drive her away. Afraid that this all just a phase or something...

I've never really dealt with these kind of... issues before.



  1. You're directly involved with the motherfucking Slender Man. It'll all end in tears.

  2. If this kind of thing gets to you, then you might want to find another line of work.

  3. I've been so alienated by my family and peers I consider myself asexual. I've never been kissed or been on a date either. My sister and stepfather were in the habit of speculating whether I'm gay (I'm not) whenever we had a family gathering. I can barely remember getting a hug when I was growing up, let alone being told I was loved. I'm a mess.

    That said, if you can trust my advice... there are worse reasons to fall together with someone. Lexi seems like a nice enough person, honest; honesty is always a must in a relationship. And you know she can read this blog, right? You just outted yourself. If she feels the same, I'm sure she'll talk to you about this soon enough.

  4. I've never been in a relationship either. Of course, I'm a spirit that eats people possessing a high schooler. What's your excuse?